I love to listen to music...I know nothing about it, I've never played an instrument and I can't sing, but I always find songs to match my moods or a time in my life. I was sitting at my desk this morning listening to the radio when this song came on! It made me think of the adoption process and all of the ups and downs. Here is a link to the lyrics if you want to read. Enjoy!
A wonderful weekend. Ed and I buckled down, put last weeks sadness behind us and put in some long hours working on the house. We've been remodeling our bedroom forever...really, it's been torn up for about 5 months now. Ed works really hard at work so coming home to work isn't exactly fun but we just want this project done! Over the past few months we: tore down 80 year old plaster walls, insulated, drywalled, refinished the floors, put up a new ceiling, redid electrical, painted, etc...it's been a big project, but it's almost done! I'll post pictures when it's finished. We are just waiting for our new bedroom set to be done (Ed's best friend is making it for us...yay!) and then we will be golden!
Thank you all so much for your words of encouragement and prayers. Really, they mean more than you will ever know.
Several of you have commented on how our agency shouldn't have said anything until they were for sure...maybe you're right. I don't know. I know that they did tell us because they were so excited to share the news of a "possible" referral and they NEVER saw this coming. The orphanage just signed on with our agency and they were very eager to place the kids so they quickly provided a list of available children to our agency...overall, it was just miscommunication and based on our preferences of having a child under 12 months, they couldn't place the child with us. Despite the anger and sadness, I don't blame the agency. Their hearts were in the right place.
Now I'm curious to know about the baby's dossier. We "think" and I've learned to use that term loosely, that once the baby's dossier is complete, we can receive the referral. I don't believe this time line follows the traditional 120 day time line because it includes the time for the province to approve everything and schedule the G&R ceremony. I am hoping that the actual dossier itself can be compiled in a much more timely fashion. I think I may be institutionalized if I have to wait another 120 days!
For those of you not familiar with the 120 day time line...here it is:
The time line identified in Article 40.1 is 120 days. Article 40 also allows for the period to be prolonged 30 days for police verification. The breakdown is as follows:
We just got an email that said the referrals that were brought back with our VN coordinator last week were for older children. They said there were several babies at the orphanage who would be eligible for referrals once their paperwork is ready. We were told that another staff member from our agency is going to VN next week to meet with the orphanage director to figure out what's going on and which babies will be ready. Sooooo, what does this mean for us? We don't really know. We are not expecting our referral anytime soon. I'm not sure how long it takes to complete the baby's dossier, I guess time will tell. :(
Sorry for the following post, but I just need to vent!
I don't know what to think...I'm starting to feel like this referral is NEVER going to come. We were told three weeks ago that it looked like they had a referral for us at one of our newest orphanages, but they needed updated info and didn't want to give us a partial referral. We completely understood and thought, yeah, it would best to know everything at once and to make sure everything checks out. Well, our VN coordinator went to VN for two weeks (to gather the missing info amongst other things) and she is now back in the US and we still can't get any sort of update! Seriously people, we have a lot of lives on hold right now...let's get it together!
In the back of my mind I just keep thinking that they are really working hard and they are just waiting to call to say "we have your baby girl"...that's crazy right?
It's sad that on Wednesday...the week is only half over and I am already giving up hope it's going to happen this week!
Ok, I'm done...thanks for letting me vent.
We spent our weekend celebrating graduations! We went to see Ed's sister Meaghan graduate as well as her boyfriend Nick and their cousin Emily. What a celebration! We had a great time!
Congrats to you all! We're so proud of you...watch out world!
No news on the adoption front...Our agency's VN coodinator, who was in in VN for the last two weeks, is now back in the US. We think she is holding the photos and info of our little ones, but she was out sick today which means no news for us! We're praying this is our week, but hey, we've been praying for that for a while now :)
So I've had a cold/sinus thing all week but because of a hectic schedule, I wasn't allowing myself to call in sick. Last night while Ed and I were eating dinner he suggested I take today off to rest before we headed out of town for the weekend. I thought about it and decided I would, even though I was missing a dept. meeting this morning. I called my school to tell them I would be out and then I called my co-worker who runs the meetings and left her a message telling her I wouldn't be at the meeting. No problem, right? A nice sunny Friday to loaf around the house. Anyway, at 8:15 the phone rings and it's my co-worker. She said "Jenna, you are missing your surprise baby shower!" NOOOOO...of all days to call in, I had to pick the day of my FIRST baby shower! I told her that sick or not, I was coming in. She insisted that I didn't but when I hung up the phone...I scrambled to the shower, threw on my "pregnant on paper" t-shirt, put my hair in a pony tail, grabbed the camera, and was out the door. I walked in and was greeted with a lot of surprised faces. She had already told everyone that I was home sick...I came running in yelling "I can't miss my first baby shower, are you kidding!" They were so gracious and gave Ed and I a gift certificate to pick out some goodies at Babys R Us! We can't wait to register. We plan on doing it as soon as the referral comes.
I am now back at home...taking the rest of the day off :)
Adoption update...This email was in our inbox when I got home from the shower:
"I've been promised Referral information "next week" so keeping fingers crossed about that.... We don't have a list of what ages the kids are."
So I don't know what to believe...I thought they were waiting only on medicals...maybe, maybe not. I'm going to try not to worry about it and let that magical phone call come next week!
We received our amazing donation from Robeez! We will be taking these shoes to Ella's orphange to help keep 250 tiny toes cozy.
Nothing to report...we are still waiting for medicals on the babies. I feel like a broken record, but we hope to have some news next week!
We are looking forward to our weekend...we are heading out of town to see Ed's little sister graduate from college! (She was only 12 when I met Ed...wow, how time flies) Congrats Meaghan! We love you and are so proud of you!
Judging by the email I just got, and I'm still hoping to get a little more info, they have the referrals and are just waiting for the updated medicals before they pass anything along. The babies were being taken to the local hospital, but I don't know the time line on that or if it's already happened ( which I hope, I hope is the case). I'm praying we hear something by the week's end! I'll keep you posted :)
Update: Tuesday evening...probably another week or so...this is getting ridiculous. Apparently they don't think the baby's medicals will be received for a little while yet. I'm totally done "speculating" time frames...it's not doing any good. gggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Ed and I had planned on going to see my brother and his family this weekend, but he got offered work at the last minute...so I went solo. I think it was good for me. Three hours of driving in the sunlight with the music cranked, a perfect recipe for clearing the head. Here is what I saw as I rolled into the driveway. Too cute!
The other reason for my visit was to work on the website for our bedding company with my brother. We spent several hours at the computer working, but we're very happy with the final product! Thanks Justyn - you rock!
Anyway, tomorrow is a fresh start to a new week and I'm looking forward to the prospect of our referral.
Hope all of you mommies and mommies-to-be had a very special Mother's Day!
No news. My fellow adoption buddy Heather recently suggested this song for some inspiration. (Warning...may cause eyes to become teary). This song is by Steven Curtis Chapman, a Christian singer who has three daughters adopted from China. (Sorry, I can't figure out how to make it play automatically from Blogger - I'll work on that later).
Update: Looks like it may be a little longer until we hear something. Apparently they are still getting "additional information" whatever that means... grrrr!
Well, I unfortunately don't have any news. I evidently can't "will" my phone to ring, nor can I stop thinking about the moment when we will see our little girl's face for the first time. It's nighttime in Vietnam right now and our little baby girl is snuggled into her crib. I hope she is resting peacefully and knowing how much her mommy and daddy love her!
I wonder if I can will my phone to ring by just staring at it... You know the waiting is getting bad when Ed sends me 6 text messages within 4 hours. My favorites "Dude, where's my baby..."? followed by "Need directions baby Ella?" Ahhh, the simple things that make me laugh these days. We still have approximately three more hours before the office closes...ring phone, ring!
I know several of you have been checking in to see if we have any news, and I'm sad to say...no news. We really felt like today would be our day, but as the hours fly by, I'm not getting a good feeling about our chances. There are a few more (business) hours in the day so there's still a chance...otherwise I start the emotional roller coaster (after another sleepless night) tomorrow ;-)
Thanks for all of the well wishes...we know in our hearts that we are close!
A big thanks to M. over at Grouchos Family. She mentioned a great program that Robeez has called Heart and Sole.
They provide footwear to non-profit organizations and charities overseas, as well as parents traveling to adopt. I just got off the phone with the media relations contact and she is sending me 25 pair of the cute little shoes to share with the kiddos in Ella's orphanage! It's a great donation, as these little guys cost around $26/pair! Ah, May...May 2005 was when Ed and I decided we were ready to start a family. Little did we know that in May of 2007, we still wouldn't have our baby. The first year was tough...after an endless amount of pregnancy tests and tears, we finally decided to sit down with a Reproductive Endocrinologist in July of 2006. After weeks of testing, he told us, "from our test results, I see no reason why you aren't conceiving". He continued to explain our options and the different treatments that we could pursue if we chose. We sat and listened, but something just didn't feel right. I will always remember the car ride home from the hospital that day. I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me. If there was nothing wrong, there was nothing to fix. Just then it was as if something had hit Ed and I like a brick wall. Within days of our doctor's appointment, Ed and I began researching adoption. We never went back to the doctor, and we haven't looked back since. We knew in our hearts that this was meant to be. We have grown so much and in so many ways over the past two years and I wouldn't change it for the world. I feel that this experience, the roller coaster of a ride it has been, has made us look at life in a different light and has made us so much stronger.
I believe there are people in our lives that still feel bad for us...they feel that this is adoption may be our second choice and that I will be "missing" something by not experiencing pregnancy. I am here to tell you that I don't feel that way and that I am not missing anything. It is my wish that everyone could experience the highs and lows, the crazy mood swings, and the endless cravings (for information) that we have faced with the adoption. I feel that I am going through my own special labor and delivery to bring Ella home. Maybe I will get pregnant someday and if I do...I will be happy and if I don't, I will be just as happy. (As long as people NEVER say "I knew you would get pregnant as soon as you adopted"!)
Enough of my sappy self. On to the exciting news. I was told today that our agency expects our referral any day...really, any day! They are still waiting for a little more information, but one of our agency reps is in Vietnam this week and is going to meet with the children and get the information and then the referrals should be ready (I hope, I hope). For those who don't remember, we are kind of working with two agencies. Our local agency has a contract with a larger "partner" agency who is actually licensed for international adoptions in Vietnam. The partner agency is the one gathering the rest of the info. Once they get the info they are waiting for, they will forward the referral onto our local agency and then it comes to us. What a process! Anyway, we know that we are so close and that Ella is out there getting ready for us! This is going to be a long few days/weeks (I hope not that long)! Please say a little prayer for us ...that I stay sane and that Ed can handle me during the wait. ;-) It's difficult to know that she is so close, but we can't see her yet. We have so much joy and excitement in our hearts right now we can't even explain it. AHHHHH!
